The Upside Down Truth. Want Greater Influence? Start With the Person Who Can’t Pay You Back!
What building a disciple-making app taught me about generosity and the backwards economy of relational influence
When I launched The Great Team App (CLICK HERE), an APEST assessment tool designed to help believers discover their unique calling in the body of Christ, I knew I needed feedback to fine-tune it and make it special.
Real feedback!
The kind of feedback that comes from people who’ve been in the trenches of disciple-making AND platform building, not just theorists with opinions.
So I reached out to about thirty friends, disciple-makers, platform builders, and ministry leaders. These were people I respected and trusted to give me honest input. I expected maybe half would respond. I hoped a few would give me some bullet points. I’d be grateful for anything.
What I didn’t expect was who responded and at what level of detail.
The Surprise That Shouldn’t Have Been
The responses started trickling in. Some were quick notes: “Looks good!” Others were slightly more detailed. A few people apologized that they didn’t have time to dive deep, but wished me well. All of this was expected, appreciated, and honestly, good enough.
💥 But then something unexpected happened. 💥
The most detailed, thoughtful, and actionable feedback didn’t come from my friends with the most margin. It came from the people who, by all accounts, should have had the least time to give.
Four people (let’s call them the “influencers” at some level in some context) invested significant amounts of time reviewing the tool. We’re not talking about a quick five-minute scroll-through. I’m talking about line-by-line critiques, user experience observations, theological considerations, and strategic recommendations.
Here’s the kicker: these weren’t just any four people. They were among significant voices in the disciple-making space, on Substack, on social media platforms, and in their networks. People with podcasts, book deadlines, coaching clients, and full ministry calendars.
The people who should have been too busy were the ones who showed up the most.
Thank you, Kirk Walden, Em Tyler, Christopher Lind, Joel Salinas !
The Pattern That Makes Sense in Hindsight
At first, I thought it was a coincidence. Maybe they just happened to have a slow week. Or maybe I said something that caught their attention.
But as I sat with their feedback, feedback that genuinely made the tool better and sharper, I realized I wasn’t looking at coincidence.
🔄 I was looking at a pattern.
These reviewers and successful voices aren’t successful despite their generosity. They are successful because of it.
The very thing that makes them “too busy” to help, their influence, their following, their impact—was built on a foundation of exactly this kind of investment in others. They didn’t guard their time like a scarce resource to be hoarded.
🌱 They stewarded it like a seed to be sown. 🌱
And the harvest?
A following that wasn’t built on hype, but on trust. On value. On genuine care for the Kingdom and the people in it.
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The Upside-Down Economics of Influence
This flies in the face of everything our culture teaches us about success.
We live in a world that says:
Guard your time
Charge for your expertise
Build a platform first, serve people second
Only help people who can help you back
🤯 But relational success operates on a completely different economy. 🤯
Jesus said it plainly in Mark 10:43-45:
“Whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
The influencers who invested in my little app weren’t practicing some advanced growth-hacking strategy. They were simply living out what Jesus modeled: the more you give, the more you gain, not in a prosperity gospel sense, but in a Kingdom-impact sense.
Their influence isn’t manufactured. It is earned.
And it was earned the same way Jesus earned His:
by washing feet when everyone else was jockeying for position.
What This Means for Disciple-Making
Here’s where the rubber meets the road for those of us in the disciple-making trenches.
We can spend all our time strategizing about how to build movements, or we can start investing in the people right in front of us.
🤝 Not because they can do something for us.
📢 Not because they have a platform.
🚶🏼♀️➡️🚶🏽➡️But because that’s what disciple-makers do.
The APEST tool helps people identify their roles in the body—whether they’re apostles, prophets, evangelists, shepherds, or teachers. But here’s what I learned:
‼️ Your calling is confirmed not by what you say you are, but by how you invest in others. ‼️
The real apostles are out there making a way where there is no way—for others.
The real prophets are speaking truth ➠ to build up, not tear down.
The real evangelists are sharing good news ➠ not building a brand.
The real shepherds are caring for people ➠ even when no one’s watching.
The real teachers are equipping others ➠ without needing the credit.
The influencers who showed up for me? They embodied their gifting not by taking an assessment, but by living it out in a seemingly small moment, giving feedback on a tool that would help others, not themselves.
The Disciple-Making Challenge
So here’s my challenge to you, and to myself:
Who are you investing in that can’t pay you back?
Not in a transactional sense. Not in a “I’ll scratch your back if you scratch mine” sense. But in a “I’m going to pour into you because that’s what disciples do” sense.
Maybe it’s:
The guy in your X-group who’s always got more questions than answers
The new believer who still doesn’t know how to navigate a Bible app (like this one)
The ministry leader who reached out for advice but has nothing to offer you in return
The person on your prayer map who doesn’t even know Jesus yet
This is where multiplication happens. Not in the spotlight. Not on the stage. But in the margins—those moments when you have every excuse to say “I’m too busy” but instead you say “How can I help❓”
Because here’s the truth: the size of your influence will never exceed the size of your investment in others.
The most followed voices aren’t the ones shouting the loudest. They’re the ones serving the most.
The most impactful leaders aren’t the ones building platforms. They’re the ones building people.
The most trusted coaches aren’t the ones selling courses. They’re the ones giving away wisdom.
The Invitation
I’m not saying you need to respond to every request or say yes to every ask.
Jesus didn’t.
Margin matters.
Sabbath matters.
Discernment matters.
But I am saying this: if you want to multiply disciples and build something that lasts, you can’t do it by hoarding your expertise, guarding your time, or waiting until you have “more margin.”
The writers taught me that.
They didn’t wait until they had less to do. They made time in the middle of everything they were already doing. Because that’s what disciple-makers do. That’s what Jesus did.
He had the weight of the world on His shoulders, literally, and still stopped for blind Bartimaeus. Still took time for the woman at the well. Still invested in twelve guys who would change the world, even when everyone else thought they were a waste of time.
So maybe the question isn’t “Do I have time to invest in this person?”
Maybe the question is: “Do I have the faith to believe that investing in this person is exactly what God is calling me to do right now?”
What’s your next step?
Think about the last request you turned down because you were “too busy.” Was it really about time, or was it about priority? Ask the Holy Spirit to show you one person this week who needs your investment. Not your leftovers. Your intentionality.
🤜 🤛 Then reach out.
⏰ Make time.
Be the kind of person who builds influence by giving it away.
Because that’s how Kingdom multiplication works.
Drop a comment below:
Who’s one person you’re going to invest in this week, even if you feel like you don’t have the margin?
Wow Kevin. I actually got choked up when I read this. I so desperately just want to use everything I’ve been gifted by God to serve and be his light wherever I go. Most of the time, I feel like I’m falling short or that the things I do don’t really make a difference.
Your gratitude for what was me just wanting to see and contribute to helping you soar means more than you probably even realize.
Thank you. And, to anyone reading this, I’ll add this. What Kevin described in here isn’t easy. Everything in this world will tell you it’s the wrong path, that you’re being taken advantage of, that if you don’t change there won’t be enough left for you. You’ll also feel it in your bones all the time. The ache from your sin nature is hard. You have to actively fight against it.
However, God always holds true on his promises. He will always give you an abundance, even in the moments when it doesn’t feel like it. And, you’re never alone, even when nobody stands with you. Jesus will always be right there helping you take one step forward and growing more like him each day.
Another facet of the upside down kingdom. Such a great reminder that we don't need to live with a scarcity mindset when we serve the giver of every good thing.